Well I got 'er done in more ways then one.
I got my planned 6 miles in, which I was dreading and I didnt do to bad either. OK, so yes, I thought I might pass out and I seriously considered laying down and waiting for someone to drive by, pick me up and roll me out of the car on the way past my house. However, then I remembered it was Sunday and that the people who typically drive by the morning are early 20 something guys....I didnt think that was the best plan I had ever come up with. So I sucked it up, cursed myself and my brilliant 1/2 marathon idea and finished the stupid run.
Yes, I whined the whole way however true to form, once I got done and looked at my watch and realized that I had just run farther then I had ever run before and that my time wasnt terrible (59:41 for 9:56 average mile, Ill take it!). Of course I will do it again, Im not giving up on the 1/2...Im way to stubborn for that but I will probably have to convince myself of why it was a good idea over and over and over again. And again.
Not that finishing the 6 miles wasnt enough of a motivation for me BUUUT when I weighed myself and found that I had HIT.MY.GOAL.WEIGHT I was soooo happy!
All that running paid off 10 months after I started. I am down 65lbs and where I was when I got married in November 2008. I may weigh the same but Im in better shape, which is a great feeling! My husband even said that I look better then I did when we got married, which is a really good feeling as he is NOT an overly mushy, romantic kinda guy. And he told me that withot being prompted, which means he really means it. Not like when I came into the house, collapsed on the floor, threw my garmin at him and said "you better tell me how fantastic that run time is or I will hurt you".
I was never much of a goal setter when I was younger. I wish now I had been. Setting goals and reaching them with all the set backs and ups and downs is such a great feeling. Its something I am going to teach my kids because I want them to be proud of what they can do. With running, its all me. No one else is kicking my butt out the door, setting my alarm clock or pushing me up those hills. Its me. I can give credit to the people who support me, my running buddies, my family and friends who say "good job" or "way to go" but in the end....I run my race. By myself. Accomplishing my goals without any assistance, which for me, makes it that much sweeter.